Human beings are intensely loyal creatures. What they are loyal to, well, that’s a wide-open deal. People are loyal to their family systems, to their schools (many schools even have a song that reinforces that loyalty), to their country, to their religion, to the local sports team.
So here it is a little aphorism for you to start the new year:
Loyalty trumps logic.
If you don’t believe me, well, exhibit A is Red Sox fans. Granted, now that the Red Sox have been winning World Series, it makes sense to be a loyal fan, but how can you explain the intense loyalty of the fan base for the 60 odd years when they never won? From a purely rational perspective, it would have made far more sense for all those Red Sox fans to become Yankee fans. But they didn’t.
The thing to know about loyalty is, it is its own reward. That is to say, being loyal, all by itself, releases endorphins in the mind. Even if there is no other tangible reward being offered in exchange for that loyalty, it still offers the reward of a good feeling. Thus, it is very easy to fall into being loyal for no “good” reason.
So if you’re thinking about making some New Year’s resolution, here is a different way to go about it: every time you feel an impulse to do something that perhaps, in a fit of calm reflection, you decided to try to stop doing in 2013, instead of using willpower, ask yourself this question: are you reaching for that cookie or doughnut because you have some logical reason for it? (And by way, deriving pleasure from consuming it is a logical reason.) Or are you being driven by a loyalty reflex? That is to say, are you feeling like you’re being a loyal member of the group by eating what everyone else is eating, even though you’re not hungry and that cookie is causing you stuffed stomach discomfort? Do you enjoy being a loyal customer of a given doughnut shop? And are you buying more expensive brand-name aspirin (as opposed to generic) because you like the feeling of being loyal to a well-known national brand name?
And even more pressing, are you doing things, not because you would do them on your own, but because it expresses your loyalty to your family system?
At the risk of screwing up your whole day, whatever you’re doing, try asking yourself, are you doing it because of logic, or because of loyalty?
Happy new year
© Justin Locke
