For the past few years I have going to the same stylist to get my hair cut. Her name is Jessica, she does a wonderful job. And it doesn’t hurt that she’s cute, funny, and drop dead gorgeous too.
Out of professional habit, she always starts by asking me, “so, what are we doing today?” This question always confuses me. Finally, yesterday I asked her, “about how many haircuts do you give every year?” She laughed and said, “I don’t know… thousands?”
I then asked her, “how many haircuts have I given anyone in the last year?” She laughed again and said, “I would assume, zero?”
So I said, “Based on this cursory examination of the data, which one of us do you think is more qualified to make key judgments about how my hair should be cut?”
The reason I got into this discussion with her is, even though she’s an expert at cutting hair, she has many clients who are very picky and want to get involved in the process. Nothing wrong with that per se, but the trouble with that sort of thing is, when you start telling a professional expert how to do their job, they have to stop doing it at their highest level of potential, and instead devote an enormous amount of energy to making you feel like you’ve been listened to.
This applies to hair stylists, it applies to conductors of major orchestras, and it applies to CEOs of major corporations. People like you and me are highly experienced experts at what we do, but we can’t put our full focus into doing the job if we have to constantly stop and make someone feel like we’re listening to their (useless) input.
This is a classic case of using the Trust Management Model versus the obedience management model. And it points out a very important part of the obedience management model: the obedience management model is based on mistrust. It is based on a negative view the universe. And negative views of the universe are one of the key pillars of poverty thinking. No matter how hard you try to police the potential trust violations, on your best day you just get back to zero.
This young lady who cuts my hair is a true artist. But as her customer, I also become a sort of manager. I am employing her, therefore I have power. I have to overcome all the mistrust managers who sat in her chair ahead of me, and remind her that I have great faith in her ability. And I get a great haircut every time.
© Justin Locke
