Well, I want to quickly apologize to all of my regular readers, I have been somewhat remiss in my blogging duties. I have reasonably good excuses. On January 13 I caught the horrific four-week nagging cough, which really goes for 5 ½ weeks. I have also been struggling mightily with this newfangled wordpress software. I have made major progress in that realm, I have “comment spam” filters in place as well as a stats counter.
I have also been engaged in the major upgrade of orchestra parts for some of my kid shows and . . . I’m writing a new book too.
That said, here’s the latest update:
A little over seven years ago, in fact it was January 1, 2005, I was facing one of those watershed moments in life where I had to make a decision about where I was going to go next in my life, as I could not stay where I was. After much internal discussion, I realized that what I’ve always wanted to my whole life . . . and what i never had the courage or belief that I could really do it full time . . . was to be an author and speaker. And since that day, I have been pursuing that goal avidly and doggedly.
There is a line from the conclusion of Walden, where Thoreau says something to the effect of, “if a man advances boldly in the direction of his dreams, he will meet with success unexpected in the common hours.” I have found this to be profoundly true.
Someday I’m going to write a book about the experience I’m going through right this second. Someday it will seem inspiring and noble, but today, the daily grind of marketing, the hourly stress over cash flow, these are occurring at levels that, 10 years ago, would have seemed unimaginable or even fatal to me. Now they just seem kind of, well, whatever. I have been facing some of my deepest fears, of both professional failure and of financial instability, and in doing so I have gradually become more and more free of these fears. If I were to achieve no other success from all the work of the past few years, that would be reward enough.
Something else has occurred, which is a bit of a surprise. When you do this kind of slogging-through-it marketing and career development, you tend to see it on an inch by inch, day-to-day basis. It seems like it’s going nowhere most of the time. (There are the rare glimmers– It was exciting when I got the author at Google talk opportunity, and it was exciting when I got the article in the Boston Globe a few weeks ago). There are those rare individual victories, but one loses track of the victory of cumulative effect. What I did today or yesterday seems like very little, but it’s like compound interest. Over time, it gets rather impressive. My 7-year survival is amazing enough by itself, but the people I am meeting, good heavens, serious major players are inviting me to lunch and dinner. I have people coming up to me and telling me I’m famous. weird. It took 7 years for it to happen overnight.
One other aggregate victory: I have never been shy or even insecure about getting up in front of a crowd and being the center of attention for an hour or more. But lack of humility is death in the performing business, so even though “real men don’t rehearse,” I have been slowly mulling over my presentation technique. I have the advantage, and perhaps the disadvantage, of having a little too much talent. I won’t be bashful here . . . I know I have a considerable command of the English language, I have a massive vocabulary, I have a general “way with words,” I have a gorgeous voice (so says John Williams, so you don’t have to take my word for it), and I am funny. Even so, I wanted to take a “Toyota lean” approach to making it better if I could. All too often, I’ve seen people set a certain finite level of performance ability and demand that the world accept that or no deal. I was fully committed to this career change, so I left no stone unturned.
There has been a lot of experimentation, but I am happy to say that, like Dorothy and the ruby slippers, I have in the course of my journey dispelled a great many beliefs in distant grand authority, and in facing my worst fears I’ve discovered that they are not terribly substantial, and can be melted with a cup of tap water. and I have become aware of the power I had all along.
So I have a few “book signings” coming up locally in the next couple of months . . . I’m feeling more confident than ever. I am still hopeful for that big break where I will be traveling to speak at major corporate events on a weekly basis. I just keep pushing on all fronts. I have burned the boats, so there’s no going back. And I am ready.
© Justin Locke
