Most of you may be surprised . . . I certainly was . . . to discover that this week is National "Love a Fatcat" Week. Given just how much vitriol has been directed towards the super rich lately, I sat down for an interview with Gus Fenderson, national director of Love a Fatcat International, for this decidedly different world view.
JL: So Gus . . . National Love Fatcat Week . . can you explain this? Aren’t we supposed to hate rich people?
GF: [laughs] well that is the general consensus I guess. But we’re trying to change all that.
JL: Why? Aren’t the super rich the cause of all our current economic problems?
GF: Well yes and no. Let’s face it, there’s a little bit of an ulterior motive in there. People who are not super rich have always been a tad peevish about the people who are super rich. It’s natural to resent people who have more money than you do, even if it’s just a coupla bucks.
JL: So given that, why the love a fatcat week? And why the “have you hugged a billionaire today?” sweatshirt?
GF: Well it’s pretty simple actually. As we see it, the problem is not the presence of the super rich per se. The reason the super rich are so incredibly super rich lately is mainly because they aren’t spending their money fast enough. The more we decry their extravagant lifestyles, the less likely it is that they will go out and de-super-richify themselves by spending lots of money. The last thing you want to see in terms of economic recovery is Paris Hilton shopping at Walmart. We would be much better off telling them how great they are for owning multiple homes and yachts and throwing big parties. Their conspicuous consumption benefits everyone, and they are just as good at stimulating the economy by throwing money away as the federal government. Better actually, because when they do it themselves, it cuts out the middleman.
JL: But don’t you think it’s immoral for there to be such a gap between rich and poor?
GF: Well sure, but what are you going to do about it? Taxing them won’t help. Between their influence with congress and their phalanx of expert tax attorneys, you could raise their tax rate to 110% and their tax liability would still be zero. We would be much better off telling them how great it is that they are spending so much money. And if we play our cards right and get them to spend a whole lot more on themselves, well hey– pretty soon they’ll all be flat broke just like the rest of us, and everyone will be happy.
© Justin Locke
